I was on my own with Bub for a couple days this week. I used to get really nervous being on my own with him but lately, I’ve enjoyed it. I used to get anxious about taking him out of the house on my own, finding enough things for him to do so he doesn’t get bored with me, and not having Steve around to give me a break. But the past couple times I’ve solo-parented, Bubba and I have fallen into a simple routine.
That’s not to say the anxiety doesn’t knock on my door every now and then. When I’m on my own, a little voice pops in my head asking me if I’ve locked the back door or turned off the burner. I second-guess myself for a little too long on whether I’ve poured milk into the dirty cup we used for our paintbrushes. Not having another adult around can be hard.
Despite the little anxieties, I’m reminding myself that when it’s just me and him, the pros outweigh the cons. This is my special time with him. I soak it all in because I know this precious toddler time is fleeting. I relish the slowness of the hours, the joy in the mundane, the boring bits of our lives.
Cuddling, cooking, carefree at the park - this is how I’ll remember my solo days with him.
